Moms Using Doctor Google

We’ve all been there as mothers. We find a small spot on our baby’s body or we question their gross motor development and off we go! To Doctor Google. We search and spend sometimes hours combing research articles that we barely understand (at least I don’t) and scrolling through mom forums from 2016 when Lauren and Julie were commenting back and forth about a similar concern. This can be either exacerbated by the sleep deprivation or a cause as we lie awake reading enough to write a dissertation on the topic of concern. We all know internally this is generally not a healthy habit and adds to our anxiety and rumination. But we just. can’t. help it.

Since we know our momma instinct is hard to distinguish from momma anxiety/rumination, here are some tips to help eliminate even a little bit of distress when we are tempted to get lost in Doctor Google:

1. Limit. Limit the amount of time you research your concern. Set an alarm if you need to. Determine ahead of time what is going to be helpful and productive versus harmful. Smart phones allow us to set time limits on certain apps so use them for protecting your mental health.
2. Accountability. If you find yourself going back to Doctor Google or even just thinking about the worst case scenarios, reach out to the support people in your life, mom friends, relatives, partner. Share that you’re catching yourself spending more time than is helpful with scrolling and allow them to help you distract, ground, or plan productively.
3. Medical Team. This is when a trusted and validating medical team can be worth its weight in gold. A good pediatrician will hear you out, ask questions, create monitoring plan and/or provide referral if necessary. You should feel they are truly considering your concern, and rather than dismissing it, assess, question, and specify what they’re looking for that would raise their concerns as well. This allows you to feel heard and educated as to when you would need to advocate for further care. If you don’t have a team who does this naturally, advocate for yourself. Your relationship with your pediatrician should be that. A relationship. Where needs are expressed and listened to. If they still don’t respond, make a change in your team.
4. Mental Health Team. If you find yourself still struggling with rumination after these three steps, consider seeking a safe therapeutic space to share your fears, anxieties, and triggers. Use the space to connect the dots of your current neural pathways in your brain and strategize on how to rewire your thought patterns. Who wouldn’t want to have that safe space in their life to do such crucial work?  

So before you keep scrolling, take a pause and consider these steps. You deserve to live a life without becoming consumed by Doctor Google.