Adoption Myths and Misconceptions

Adoption. The word “adoption” can be associated with many different emotions as well as stereotypes and sometimes even horror stories. These inaccurate speculations cause many families to stray away from growing their family through adoption. Below are five common myths about adoption that we have debunked for you:

Birth parents are always teen moms

Statistics show that most birth parents are in their 20’s and 30’s and are already parenting other children. They often chose adoption because they are struggling in different areas of life and can be a single parent who wants a better life for their child. Typically, they want to play an active role in the child’s adoption plan including choosing the adoptive parents and having ongoing contact.

A birth parent can take their child back even after the adoption is completed

In the state of Illinois, birth parents must wait a minimum of seventy-two hours after the baby is
born before they can legally surrender their parental rights. Once the legal forms have been completed, birth parents cannot take the baby back or revoke their decision. After finalization by a judge, about six months later, the adoption placement is permanent and the adoptive parents have all of the legal rights to the child.

Open adoption means co-parenting with the biological parents

Today, the majority of adoptions are open. This means there is some level of communication between the adoptive family and birth parent(s). The type and frequency of the communication is determined by the adoptive family and birth parent(s). The communication between both parties is not a gateway for co-parenting. The adoptive family is the legal guardian of the child and makes all decisions regarding the child’s life. Having open communication is beneficial to a child’s overall well-being.

Adoption agencies have a waiting list, and it takes years to adopt

Every agency is different. Currently, our agency does not have a waitlist to begin the adoption/ home study process. Potential adoptive families create profile books for the potential birth parent(s) to view. When a potential birth parent(s) chooses an adoptive family, they can connect with each other through a third party, like Hopeful Beginnings. Since the potential birth parent(s) are given the opportunity to pick the family they place their child with, the time hopeful adoptive parents wait depend on their individual case.

Adopting transracially is too complicated

Transracial adoptions can certainly pose unique challenges, but being a family is simple. You may have to learn about caring for different types of hair and skin after adopting a child of a different racial background. It is also equally important to provide your child with role models from their own racial/cultural background. However, this is an opportunity for you to learn about your child’s heritage and incorporate their heritage into your family as well. The physical differences between you and your child may be apparent, but insignificant compared to the love you will have for your child.